Monday, February 18, 2013

Mommies Behaving (Slightly) Badly

Tonight's cocktail is a glass of champagne. Look, I poured one for you, too!

Not long ago, a friend of a friend had a Groupon for a nighttime limo tour of DC for 6 people, and I got to go. You know how usually, when you anticipate some kind of awesome event, when it actually happens, it's never as good as you thought? This turned out to be way, WAY better.

Some of it probably had to do with expectations. We're all 30-40 something suburban moms. Standing in line for a club in scanty clothes and uncomfortable heels is not exactly what we're into anymore, if we ever were (confession: I was never that cool). Our needs were much simpler: to be able to drink and tell raunchy stories in a place where our children (and husbands and ex-husbands) could never find us exactly, with periodic photo ops.

The Kennedy Center: elegant, great view, free public restrooms with no lines!
First off, the limo was pimped out, yo. It had a great sound system (which we accidentally broke, but then our longsuffering driver fixed it) glassware and ice, and fiber optic pinpoint lighting. Now, maybe you're a rock star and ride around in cars like that all the time, but it was only my 2nd time in a limo, so I was excited.

Obviously, there was lots of drinking. It was BYOB, so I went for a simple mix of pink lemonade and vodka, periodically topped with sparkling water. By the time we made it in from Virginia, we were all lightly toasted, and we were enjoying each other's company so much that we didn't pay that much attention to our surroundings for awhile, though when we got to Dupont Circle and Adams Morgan, those of us who'd lived here during our irresponsible years got to survey which of our former watering holes were still in business. That was a little depressing, so we drank some more.

Not drunk at ALL!
We directed our driver down to the monuments, and we decided to stop at Lincoln because it has the best car access. We drunkenly stumbled up the steps, huddled for warmth, giggling, for the photo. If you live in D.C., chances are you only make it to the tourist areas every few years, likely when friends and family are visiting. Surprisingly, there was a whole middle school field trip communing with Mr. Lincoln, so we got to serve as an alarming cautionary tale for them, because it took awhile for us to realize how very loud we were being. See, the memorials are supposed to be sites to honor our national heroes, for quiet contemplation of their legacy. Like this:

Not this:

Still, I like to think Abe was happy for some lively company so close to his birthday. We're all fans.

Anyway, it really was a magical evening, despite the fact that one of us, who shall remain forever nameless, had to bail out of the limo to go pee in the (heavily wooded) front yard of a palatially large house with a view of the Potomac towards the end of the evening. My point is this: mommies (and parents more generally) need connection. Parenting can be a profoundly isolating and lonely business at times, especially if you're the primary caregiver to small children. There was no particular magic to the limo itself, except that it gave us a context for what all really needed: to take one short evening and make it our bitch.


  1. Too fun! Brilliant blog name, btw. Following you back via GFC. Thanks for linking up to the hop!

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